I was in Utah for Easter weekend with David’s family. David drove down on Thursday and I joined him in Utah after flying down Friday afternoon. Here is some advice for a good Easter in Utah experience:
1. Do not Fly Southwest Airlines to get to Utah – I saw this mostly as future advice for myself. I don’t care how much cheaper the ticket is. I will be forced to sit next to the person on the plane that is so large that Southwest should have forced her to buy two airline tickets. She will be unable to put the armrests down that surround her seat. She will take up half of your seat. You will only have one half of your seat on which to sit. You will be sticking out into the aisle and the flight attendants will hit you every time they pass you. She will be the last person to get on the plane which means there will be not other seats to which you can move. You will feel guilty for not feeling pity and sadness for her and instead feel anger and resentment, even fear because she cannot wear her seatbelt and you know in the event of a plan emergency, you will die because she will literally suffocate you with her body weight. It will be miserable.
2. Do see old friends whom you love and miss dearly – Particularly if your friend is named Charelle, because you know that she is one of the coolest girls on the planet. I not only got to see Charelle, and meet her boyfriend, Carl, but I also was able to eat at Cafe Rio with Charelle and Carl. After dinner and dessert, David indulged me for a trip down to Provo so I could also see my friend Neil and his wonderful wife, Sherisa. I love hanging out with Neil because it makes me feel like I am 22 again and I can stay up until 4:00 in the morning talking about every subject on the planet, from medical ailments and drug treatments, to war protests, to what to do in Paris. Such great friends and great conversation!
3. Do enjoy some bowling – My senior year at BYU I went bowling with some group including the following individuals at least one night per week: Brett, Brandon, Neil, Kenny, Eric, Christian, Kelly, my Sunshine House roommates, or the Brick House Girls. We did it so often that I actually began averaging a score of 120 each time. Now I am out of practice and bowl extremely poorly, but if nothing else, bowling is always a great way to enjoy some family time and an appropriate venue to play Lynard Skynard on the jukebox. Lucky for me, David’s mom enjoys discounts on bowling because her boss also owns the local Tremonton bowling alley. The picture below shows David and his niece Abby in the foreground and his dad, mom, and brother, Travis, behind:
4. Do enjoy the desolation that Utah has to offer – I am serious on this one. I grew up in a world that was green and lush, which I sometimes missed terribly during my years in Utah. But at the same time, there is something incredibly theraputic and welcoming about the intoxicating barreness of Utah’s deserts. Typically I am speaking about the starkness of the red rock wilderness of Southern Utah, but I am learning to appreciate the brown scrublands of Northern Utah in their own way. David took me to the Golden Spike Monument at Promentory where there is nothing but a railroad that no longer goes anywhere and dusty hillsides. Perhaps I am still attracted to the existential notion of a railroad to nowhere.
It is barren to be sure, but there is a plaque to commemorate where the last railroad tracks were laid to connect the first transcontinental railroad.
And of course David was also there so I could enjoy it with him.
5. Do find a bunny in the desert – Particularly because it is Easter. You can name him. I named this one Mr. Whiskers.
6. Enjoy the Ride Home in a Honda Civic– If David is driving (or talking on his Blackberry when you are driving), it is far more entertaining and comfortable, and it is spent with far more pleasant company than a plane trip can afford.